{The storm hasn’t come. It feels instead as though the sky has lowered, the purple clouds around our shoulders and in our ears like all too much barometric pressure. We are going about our day, our hands doing business through the tense dampness, my limbs like old rubber bands ready to snap on anyone I touch or back, ineffective, against me. Everything is creaking or stretching, inexplicably pliable or brittle and painful.
I am stuck, somewhere in the middle, between bending and breaking, my nerves white like knuckles before they pop. I can’t find anything that I want to eat, nothing I want to drink. Everything I put on my body feels scratchy and heavy, there is no music I want to listen to, no photos I want to take. My bed is uncomfortable, his body too hot, his limbs too heavy, his breath exasperated and close, like too many purple clouds around my shoulders and in my ears.
I am waiting, continually inhaling. For the break.
5 Comments
July 15, 2009 at 12:18 am
<3 oh my friend, i feel like we speak the same interior language.
think of twilight (the time of day, not the book or movie) as a soothing break from cloudy days and nights. I hope you get a breath of fresh air amid all that weighs down, a little time of rest and lightness of feeling. I hope vibrant contrasts of blue fading sky and glowing orange lit bulbs revive your head and heart. i'm thinking of you!
July 15, 2009 at 7:58 am
if i say i love this, i promise it’s not at your expense.
July 15, 2009 at 8:47 am
Everything ok darling? This writing is lovely and I completely understand the feeling, but I just wanted to make sure that you’re alright and let you know that if you’re not, I’m always here as an electronic ear and shoulder to lean on.
July 15, 2009 at 7:28 pm
should all pain be so poetic. your writing is spell-bounding. how can i “lightly” say…feel better? but please….do.
beijos!
July 16, 2009 at 11:30 am
Oh sweet, I hate the in betweens. The good news is you will get through them, it’s just the waiting that gets to you. Thinking of you <3